Good Questions Good Info Good Interview
Picking the right officiant for your special day is vital so your day can be everything it can be. But how you go about this is probably not something you have experience with. So we have organized a few tips and questions in 5 different sections to help you get it right. Read on for ideas on how to choose a qualified, dedicated and genuinely professional officiant.
(1) Experience & Credibility
“We want to know more about you: How long have you been officiating? How many weddings will you be doing in next 6 months? Could you have another wedding on our date? How close in time?
“What do you think makes you unique or special from other officiants?” Ask for details.
“Do you have testimonials from videographers, photographers, musicians or DJ’s? These vendors will have seen your officiating from beginning to end as a part of their work.
“Do you have unsolicited testimonials from family and couples?
“Are you legally-able to officiate our marriage? How can we know that? We want to feel reassured.
(2) Beliefs Compatibility
Suggestion: Start this part with ‘connecting’ words like: “We want your beliefs and our beliefs to be compatible with each other; we have a few questions:
1st tell them the spiritual, non-religious or religious beliefs you want (or don’t want) in the ceremony and then ask: "Are you 100% okay with this?"
“What are your thoughts about having humor in the ceremony? Give us an example of what is humorous to you.
“How do you feel about us writing and reciting our own vows? Can we do our vows any way we want?
(For civil couples:) “How do you feel about our having no prayer in the ceremony? Can we have a poem?
“Do you have any limits to what you would say or do as part of the ceremony?
(3) Fees & Services
“What’s your fee? What’s included? What's not? Is there a travel fee?
“Do you think it’s important for the officiant to be at rehearsal? Why? or Why not?
“How much extra is rehearsal?
“Could there be other costs in the future? If so, what? And how much?
“Do you require a deposit? How much? If we were to cancel, is it refundable? What’s your policy?
“When is the balance due?
“If we choose you we’d like a written agreement. Will you provide one?
“How often can we contact you in the time before wedding day?
“Can we meet with you again in-person? Do you charge extra?
(4) On Wedding Day
“Do you have restrictions on photography or videography during the ceremony?
“How will you be dressed (robe, suit or) if we have a theme, will you wear something of the theme?
“On wedding day, will you read from a script or recite by memory? If we want you to use a script, so we can know what you will say, is this okay?
“What time will you arrive?
“Will you do a blessing or prayer before the meal at the reception? Do you charge for that?
“At a minimum would you stay for the cocktail hour? We’d like that.
(5) Important Misc
(Some of this misc may not apply or be questions you need to ask but they will make you think of other questions)
“Do you have a ‘back-up’ in case of significant illness or emergency?
“Will you marry a couple from any faith? Do you do interfaith ceremonies? Same gender? Pregnant?
“Are you open to co-officiating with another minister or rabbi or priest? How would you work with them?
We want to be absolutely sure: ‘Are you available for our date and time?’
(these questions are for you two:) Do you like this candidate? Is there a mutually warm connection? Is there anything less than 100% comfortable? If so, we suggest you bring it up now.